Her Royal Highness (theferretgirl) wrote in girlscliquefic,
Her Royal Highness
theferretgirl
girlscliquefic

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Challenge #3 "Dream"

So Uhm, I would like to apologize in advance to snoopygirll, alias_lilacgirl, vylit and cerisaye. And myself but that'd be useless.

Bad Fic alert!!! Mary-Sue Alert!!! Don't say I didn't warn you.

I *promise* to try and write normal again next week, or as close to normal I can get.

How are things in "The FG Universe"

Oh..er..totally unbeta-ed..again.


Xander the Mighty!

{We look out over a thick forest somewhere in LA. A deep baritone voice can be heard singing a song, Scaring away any living thing in the vicinity}

Voice:
Xander the Mighty roams through the countryside!
He never needs a place to hide!
With Wessy as his sidekick!
Fighting with his little stick!
Running around and singing songs!
Being mighty all day long!
He's Xandeeeer....Xander the Mightyyyyyy!!!

{We see Xander jumping out of the bushes striking a dramatic pose. He's wearing pink tights, pink fuzzy bunny slippers and has a purple cape wrapped around his bare torso, looking totally embarrassed}

Xander: {totally off key}
Xander the mighty, He's very tidy!
Everyone admires Him!
He's so handsome its a Sin!
When things get Grim!
He'll take it on the Chin!
If your in Jeopardy!
Caught by the Enemy!
Don't call the Cavalry!
There's a better remedy!
Although he doesn't work for free!
He's everyone's trustee!
He's every womans fantasy!
Plus he's good in Company!
Look out!!!
Its Xander!!!.. XANDER THE MIGHTY!!!

{Xander flaps his cape dramatically and strikes a heroic pose.Suddenly he looks back puzzled}

Xander: {Annoyed} The song said "With Wessy as his sidekick", So where are you?!

{We hear several curses coming from out of the bushes}

Wes:{Hissing} You HAD to bring up fuzzy bunny slippers and tights!, I REFUSE to walk around like this. And Wessy???

{Xander firmly walks backward and grabs into the bushes, dragging Wes out. He's wearing purple fuzzy bunny slippers, purple tights and has a pink cape wrapped tightly around his bare torso}

Wes: {Embarrassed} Being a hero isn't at all what they make it out to be!

Xander: {Snorting} Hey we wanted to be hero's, here's our chance!. Stop complaining and follow me!

Wes: {Puzzled) Where are we going?

Xander: {Growling} To find a damsel in distress off course, where else?

Wes:: Can't we go find FerretGirl and......

Xander: {Through Clenched teeth} Be careful what you say, remember who's writing this story. {He Flashes a smile}

FerretGirl: {Off Screen} Bwhahahahahaha

{Xander pinches his the bridge of his nose and wonders how he got into this mess. He lets a deep sigh escape}

Xander: {Overly dramatic} Come my trusted sidekick!. Let us go into the "countryside" and seek out adventure!

Wes: {Uninterested} Whatever.

{We see them walking down the path uttering several curses. Their cape's keeps getting caught in the bushes and it's really not easy walking in the forest with fuzzy bunny slippers, never mind in those colors)

Xander: {Off key} Xander the Mighty!, Roams through the Countryside!.......

Wes: {Thoughtful} I'm sure I've heard that song somewhere before...

{We see the opening credits fly by the screen and get ready for part one}

**********


thegirlsclique

{The camera show us a view of thegirlsclique. It has just stopped raining. snoopygirll and alias_lilacgirl are standing each on a Pillar}

Snoopy: Well I'm stuck

Lilac: Yeah me too, I think we need help

Snoopy: Uh huh

FerretGirl: {Off screen} Great!

{Snoopy and Lilac look at each other puzzled, shrug and pay no further notion}

Somewhere in LJ Land

{Xander and Wesley are still struggling to at least attempt to walk heroic. This is no easy task, considering the fuzzy bunny slippers and the cape's that keep getting tangled in the bushes. Suddenly Xander stops, causing Wesley to bump into his back}

Wes:{Rubbing his nose} Oww!

Xander:{Looking thoughtfully} Wait a minute!

Wes: What?

Xander: {Whirling around and prodding Wes in the chest} If we are superhero's, then why are we walking!

Wes: {Blank look} Beg pardon?

Xander: {Sighing} Super Hero's fly!

Wes: Ooooh {Smiling} You're right!

{They look at each other thoughtfully}

Wes: So?

Xander: {Puzzled} What so?

Wes: How do we fly?

Xander: {Glancing off screen} Uuhm.

FerretGirl: {Off screen} Now you want to fly too?

Xander & Wes: Uh huh!

FerretGirl: {Off Screen} Oh alright!, take these! {Pushing two objects toward our super hero's}

{Xander and Wesley look at the two objects in shock and disgust}

Xander: {Insulted} Na ah!, This is where I draw the line!, NO WAY am I going to wear that!

{Wesley nods his agreement franticly causing his glasses to slide of his nose.}

FerretGirl: {Off Screen} Do you two want to fly or not? They are magical you know.

{Xander and Wesley look at each other in panic. Both are shaking their heads and back away from the new garment they are suppose to wear}

FerretGirl: {Off Screen} They have matching masks? and There are damsels in distress at thegirlsclique....

{Xander and Wes look at each other pleading, sigh and walk over to their new addition of their super hero outfit in defeat}

thegirlsclique

{Suddenly the begin tune of Xander the Mighty can be heard blasting through the air. snoopygirll and alias_lilacgirl look up in surprise}

Snoopy: {Puzzled} What the hell is that?

Lilac: {Looking around} I have no idea.

{Suddenly trumpets sound and with a flash two figures appear in thegirlsclique. They are off course Xander the Mighty and his trusted sidekick Wessy. In addition to the pastel colored fuzzy bunny slippers, tights and cape, they now have a fluorescent yellow tutu wrapped around their middle. Lucky they also have on masks disguising their true identity (or so we let them think)}

Xander: {Striking a heroic pose, hands in his sides, overly dramatic voice} Have NO Fear!, Xander the Mighty is HERE!

Wes: {Jumping from behind Xander's back, also overly dramatic} And his trusted sidekick Wessy!

{Trumpets sound again, very loud. Everyone is clasping their hands over their ears}

FerretGirl: {Off Screen} Sorry

{Snoopy and Lilac by now are getting short of breath they are laughing so hard. They're tightly holding on to their pillars}

Snoopy: {Hiccuping} What are you two doing?

Xander: {again overly dramatic} We came to the rescue!

Wes: {Lamely} Er...yes.

Lilac: Huh?

{Snoopy and Lilac look at each other and start laughing hysterical again}

Xander {Ignoring the laughter} Come Wes, let us fly up there and free the damsels from their {thinking} uhm {lamely} Pillar

Wes: {not very enthusiastic} What ever, your the boss

{They awkwardly fly toward the girls. Not having taken the time to practice their aim is a bit off. They bump into each other in the air and are thrown in a different direction. Wesley narrowly avoids collision with Lilac. Xander fly's right into Snoopy knocking her off the pillar. She lands smack in the middle of a giant mud puddle}

FerretGirl: {Off screen} Oops!

{Snoopy is struggling to get up. This is not an easy task since the mud is very slippery. She falls back into several times for that very reason. Xander tries to help her, but only succeeds in pushing her back in all the time}

{Meanwhile Wesley fly's toward Lilac who is fending him off with a rolled up piece of paper}

Lilac: {Yelling} Get away from me!

Wes: {Disappointed} But I came to rescue you?

Lilac: {Swatting toward Wesley} From what?

{Xander had finally succeeded to get Snoopy out of the mud, he himself however is covered in mud now too. Snoopy is throwing mud at him and looks very, very angry. Xander wisely runs away a few feet from her. Wesley falls flat on his face behind him. Landing still needs to be worked on}

Xander: {Tired} They said you were stuck!

Snoopy and Lilac: {Angry} In a puzzle! We were doing a Puzzle!

{Xander and Wesley glance behind the cameras)

FerretGirl: {Off Screen} Bwhahahahaha!!

{Suddenly the end tune of Xander the Mighty can be heard again}

Xander: {Tired but trying to sound heroic} Lets Go Wes {it's not very convincing}

{Wesley is too tired to reply. He almost crawls after Xander, his little stick is dragging on the ground behind him}

{The end credits role over the screen and the song can be heard}

Voice:
Xander the Mighty roams through the countryside!
He never needs a place to hide!
With Wessy as his sidekick!
Fighting with his little stick!
Running around and singing songs!
Beeing mighty all day long!
He's Xandeeeeeer... Xander the Mightyyyyyy!!!

Xander: {Screaming} AND KNOCK IT OFF WITH THE STUPID SONG!

**********


{We see the entrance of the secret duckpond...}

Xander: {Disgusted} Duckpond?

FerretGirl: {Off Screen} Yeah, BatMan has the batCave.. you have a DuckPond.

{Xander is looking less then pleased, Wesley just sighs and FerretGirl looks annoyed}

FerretGirl: {Off Screen} Can we go on now?

Xander & Wesley: {Bored} What ever..

{As we were saying, before we were so rudely interrupted. We see the entrance of the DuckPond while we hear the begin tune of Xander the Mighty}

Singing voice:
Xander the mighty roams through the countryside
He never needs a place to hide
With Wessy as his sidekick
Fighting with his little stick...

Xander: {Holding up hand} Wait just a freaken minute here...

Wes: What is it?

FerretGirl: {Off Screen}{getting very annoyed} Now what?

Xander: {Little hurt voice} How come he has a fighting stick?

Wes: {Holding up a sugar cane, left over from christmas} You mean this thing!! I couldn't knock out a Smurf with this if I pocked it in the eye with it!

{He glares over at FerretGirl who shrugs}

FerretGirl: {Off Screen} We have a tight budget.

{The rest of the begin tune drones one while Xander complains about not having a fighting stick or anything. In the midst of his complaining loud clattering and banging noises can be heard coming from outside a door}

Wes: {startled, ready to leap (gracefully) into action} What the bloody hell is that?

FerretGirl: {Off Screen} {explaining mode again} Batman has Alfred, you have uhm.....

Xander: We should have seen that comming...

{The door swing open and a figure enter. Xander's and Wesley's jaws drop and form slowley into an evil grin}

Wesley: {Trying to hold in his laughter} I can certainly say I didn't see *that* comming!

{Stalking thru the door comes Charles Gunn looking utterly displeased and is throwing dagger looks at FerretGirl who is not impressed. He's wearing a real french maidens uniform including the cute hat-thing and pumps, only his is Orange. We couldn't get the panties over his manly legs, so instead he's wearing orange tights}

Gunn: {Overacting on the british accent} Tea sir's?

{Xander and Wesley at this point loose their composure and roll over laughing and hiccuping}

Gunn: {Hissing} I don't know what you two are laughing at, you look way more ridiculous then I do!

Xander: {Still grinning} Yeah we know, but still, it does ease the pain a bit

Wes: {Hiccuping} How did you get into this mess?

Gunn: {Stuttering} Uhm.. l.... uhm.. lets not discus that right now.. uhm... Tea Sir's? {Glancing over at FerretGirl}

FerretGirl:{off Screen} Mwhahahahaha!

{Suddenly a loud beeping noise can be heard from the wall, Xander walks over and sees the DuckPuter}

Xander: {Proud} Hey cool, our very own DuckPuter!

Wes: {Whispering to FerretGirl} Tight budget hm?

FerretGirl: {Off Screen, grinning} Yeah, do try it out.

{Xander notices right away that its a voice response computer thing}

Xander: {Indignant} I refuse to say spleen.

{Gunn saunters over to the computer, jerks out the mic and holds it infront of Xander}

Gunn: {Smirking} Your such a hero. Come on, say spleen for the nice computer.

Xander: {Rolling his eye's} Fine! Spleen!

Computer: DuckPuter is now online!

{The three guy's look at each other and shrug}

Wes: {Carefully} Computer?

Computer: I am fine, how are you?

Wes: {Getting suspicious} Computer status report

Computer: I am fine, how are you?

{The guy's glance over at FerretGirl who is giggling}

Xander: Figures

Wes: {Grumbling}Tight Budget

FerretGirl: {Off Screen} Computers do come with a monitor you know!

Xander, Wes and Gunn: {Meekly} Oh yeah.

{They read that cerisaye has some trouble over in her LJ, the lay-out that she was building has a flaw and was about to collapse. It's Xander the Mighty and Wessy to the Rescue!}

Gunn: {Sighing} I'm glad thats over.

{The view goes over to Cerisaye's LJ. We see her sitting in front of her house with vylit. They are drinking tea and Cerisaye is doing some needle point work}

Cerisaye: Thank you so much for your help with the lay-out Violet, I'm glad we got it right now

Violet: Oh no problem Ceris!, Alway's happy to help out!

{Suddenly trumpets rip through the air, scaring off most living things.. and some non-living things, causing Cerisaye to prick with the needle into her fingers and Violet to drop her tea}

Violet:{Jumping up} What the...!!

{We see two figures fall from out of the sky. They are off course Xander the Mighty! and Wessy. Wesley falls into Cerisaye's roses and Xander makes an spectacular landing. We never knew he could do a split! and from the sound of it.....neither did Xander.

Xander: Joouwwwwdelodeloooooo

{Both Violet and Cerisaye wince, and so does FerretGirl (Hey! I'm not totally insensitive)}

Violet: Ouch!, That had to hurt!

{Suddenly Violet and Cerisaye see our Super Hero's wardrobe and burst out laughing, untill Cerisaye sees Wesley climbing out of her roses}

Cerisaye: {Gasping} My roses!!

Wes: {Plucking out several twigs and roses out of his fluorescent Yellow Tutu} Sorry, we still need to work on that landing.

Xander: {Throwing a heroic pose, as much as possible} We came to rescue you! {Is it me or does his voice sound a bit.. off..??}

Violet: {Surprised} Rescue? Like Snoopy and Lilac rescue?

{Wesley now also takes a heroic stance}

Wes: {Proud} Exactly!

{Cerisaye and Violet look at each other shocked and immediately post themselves in front of the LJ wielding some garden tools toward our two hero's}

Cerisaye: Oh no you dont! We don't need rescue-ing!,

Violet: Thats right! We got it all under control!, Move along boys!

{Wesley looks meekly at his hands, they are full of thorns}

Wes: {Muttering} They could have thrown in some stupid looking protective gloves

Xander: {Inching toward Cerisaye and Violet} But We were told you were in distress! We came to the rescue!

Cerisaye: {dangerous voice, watch out boys!} Nah ah! No rescue-ing required here!

{She swats him with the garden tool, Xander stumbles back, trips over his cape and falls into the roses}

Violet: Oh no!, the roses!

{Now both Cerisaye and Violet take a couple of brooms and start chasing after Xander and Wesley}

Cerisaye:: Out! Out! and come back when your normal again!

Violet: No damsels in distress here! Out!!

{Xander and Wesley make a hasty retreat flapping their fluorescent yellow tutu's. Their tights are full of holes and their capes are torn. Lovely rozes!}

FerretGirl: {Off Screen} You go girls!

{Cerisaye and Violet wield their brooms toward FerretGirl who holds up her hands and quickly stalks away snickering}

{We can hear the end tune of Xander the Mighty blasting through the air}

Singing Voice:
Xander the mighty, He's very tidy!
Everyone admires Him!
He's so handsome its a Sin!

Xander: {looking at his hands} I wonder if Gunn is any good with tweezers

Wes: {Looking at his cape} And a needle...

Singing voice:
He's Xandeeeeeer...Xander the Mightyyyyyy!!!

Spike woke up gasping an unneeded breath. With a nasty grin on his face he looked over at the other persons in the huge bed. "The bloody poof was right," he snickered. "A bit of cinnamon in the blood and you get lovely dreams."

Wesley looked up from the sofa adjusting his leg, "You've been reading fanfiction again haven't you?"

Spike's far too innocent look told him everything he needed to know.


::Hangs head in shame and blames her absent muse::

~ FerretGirl ~
ps: the song in this silly fic is from Xena "Joxer the mighty"
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